if u feel like u dont know what ur doing w ur life just remember that venus spins backwards and we dont even fuckin know why. just do whatever you wanna honestly
By accepting his Oscar, he unknowingly opened the seventh seal of the apocalypse.
GIVE IT BACK
So, fun story, the day after the Oscars I had to be taken into emergency surgery for appendicitis. It happened really fast, and I have no memory of this, but the nurses told me about how I woke up towards the end of the surgery (no a big deal, I was still hella numb and groggy, it’s not uncommon) and I was laying on the table half asleep and they noticed I was awake because I started quietly sobbing. The nurses instantly put more anaesthetic into my IV, and told me to go back to sleep. I apparently just continued to sob and moaned something along the lines of, “Leo did it.. He got his Oscar.” And the nurses, trying hard not to laugh cause this bitch in surgery is crying sweet tears of joy for Leonardo DiCaprio won his fucking Oscar, tried to sooth me and told me to go to sleep. For some reason, this freaked me out and made me cry even more and I was saying something like, “You don’t understand… Leo has won.. This is the end.” Before passing the fuck out.
The nurses were so excited to tell me about it when I woke up to ask me what I meant but I never knew until now..
(i) aphrodite spends her nights stumbling out of bars the hands of unfamiliar men wrapped around her waist. she smells like hard liquor and cigarette smoke. when dusk turns to dawn she’s always the first to leave. always running. It’s better this way, safer this way she reasons.
(ii) artemis traded in her bow and arrow for a gun. she still hunts she just hunts a different kind of prey now. she goes out at dusk and comes back home at dawn. bruised and bloody. a few bullets missing from her gun. somewhere buried deep in the body of a man who wore cruelty as if it were a second skin. who did not take no for an answer.
(iii) persephone first saw hades in a club. He was the kind of boy her mother had warned her about. Boys like that her mother had said are nothing but trouble. but persephone had never minded trouble very much. she walked up to him her lips painting a shade of pomegranate and asked if she could buy him a drink.
fun studying tip: if you’re a procrastinator, play tom jones’s “what’s new pussycat” on repeat while writing your papers and do not turn it off until you are finished, it will motivate you to finish that essay as quickly as possible
make sure to throw one “it’s not unusual” in the middle while u take ur quick snack break
BUT CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW BILL CLINTON MOUTHES “THAT’S MY GIRL” CAN WE FUCKING TALK ABOUT THAT.
Listen, I voted for her, but in my heart I don’t know that I’ve had many moments of truly liking or admiring her. But this moment? This poise? This complete self-control (in a situation where sexist men would expect her to be falling apart)? I have never been prouder or more admiring of someone. I agree, Bill. That’s our girl.
I’m a black man that LOVES to garden. I’m studying plants in school for crying out loud. Y’all should see the shit I can grow.
My specialty is fruit trees. I currently have:
3 peach, 1 apricot, 1 plum, 10 apple trees, 2 lemon trees. And I’m germinating clementine seeds right now and I’ll be cross pollinating with the Lemon trees pretty soon
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 GOOD FOR YOU BABY… IM HERE FOR THE GROWTH OF YOU FRUIT TREES.. ESPECIALLY PEACH CUZ ITS MY FAVORITE FRUIT ND COLOR 😁
Heres a few of my trees:
Peach tree, 15 years old (my very first plant)
My baby peach tree named after @pooppride , she is 6 months old and only 3 feet (I neglected to put her in the ground so she became dormant…but she’ll grow again)
My lemon tree named Courtni!!! Mind you, I live in Baltimore and its cold but I proved a lot of people wrong about growing citrus and my tree is proof that I did it
My pineapple :3 theyre really interesting to watch grow. They grow like cactus so it’s a super slow process.
Excuse me, look at my brother’s plants.
O: There used to be a guy near Baltimore who had a banana tree (idk if he still does) but he had to bring it in for the winter, is it the same way with the pineapple and the lemon?? Have you actually gotten fruit off of them??
As small as the world 